A Midnight Walk Caught Up In The Snow

We had a great Snowfall yesterday. It started in the morning and by early evening we easily had 4-5 inches of snow. Up until now, I never liked the snow. But this year has brought me new feelings and a different way to look at things.
Last night after a day of studying, I had been having a conversation with someone who I had once held their opinion very highly. They said something that really struck me and hurt me. And I realized they had always treated me this way, and I felt very hurt and angry, not necessarily at them for treating me that way, but towards myself for allowing someone to treat me that way for so many years. I was so upset, the only thing I knew to do, was get out and start walking.
I text Matt, and told him I didn't know where I was going, but I needed to go for a walk somewhere so he would know I had my phone on me. We ended up meeting up at the grocery store and he decided he wanted to walk with me. So we started walking downtown Monmouth. It was so beautiful, all the city lights, the powdery snow dusting the outline of every building and tree. There was no wind, so the walk was comfortable, and the snow gave the walk a bit of resistance similar to walking in sand.

We walked down Main Street, and then ended up going down side streets. I'm a romantic at heart. The littlest things mean great deals to me, and Matt had been there for through a lot in the 2 months we have been dating. He has kissed my forehead, the hikes we go on, a Romeo and Juliette style kiss on new years as I leaned over the edge of my balcony and we kissed, spending the night together on Christmas eve and going to Shari's restaurant at 3 in the morning Christmas day, talks that we have that are so random but important to me, and of course he was the first person to encourage me to go to school and accomplish my dreams actually believing I can and having faith in me. So last night, as we were walking through the snow, we approached a stop sign with a street light over it. When we reached it, I told him to stop, he asked "Why?". I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him and looked at him and said "I've never kissed anyone in the snow before.".
We started talking about things and I told him as well how the little things that he doesn't realize he has done with me mean so much to me. He asked me if the things we did together would mean the same thing if we were not intimate with eachother. And I told him that some of the things that we do together I would do with someone else like the hikes and walks, but the more personal intimate things like kissing in the snow wouldn't be the same because I only want to share special moments like that with the person I love.
And then, he asked me to do something for him that nobody else has ever asked of me before. He asked me if we could completely cut out the physical intimacy of our relationship to see how strong we are without it. No kissing. No hand holding, and of course no sex, no more "I love you" or calling him "Baby" or "Babe", and I couldn't call him my "Manfriend" anymore because as I had said before, it implies we are sleeping together. But we would still be exclusive. He explained that in order for him to feel comfortable with us moving forward he wants to see how well we can be friends without it. To be completely honest, if Anybody else had asked me to do this, based on my past relationships with guys, I would have thought it was because they were no longer attracted to me and wanted to end a relationship. But this, this is quite the opposite. This is a test for both of us to move forward and build a stronger foundation for a relationship. I don't know that I would have been able or willing to do this with or for anybody else, but the more I thought about it, I realized, if he is asking me to do this for him, then that means he is also willing to do that for me. I've never had a man or woman I've ever dated show me that kind of respect. I am absolutely willing and happy to make a commitment of abstinence with my best friend.
After our talk and walk around Monmouth, we decided we wanted to go check out Downtown Independence and see what the fountain looked like. It was more beautiful than we could have imagined. Here are some photos of the fountain and downtown Independence.

 

 

So that was our walk. We walked for a good 3 hours just enjoying each other and talking about our hopes and dreams and some very personally things. It was great. One of the best nights of my life. And I would like to add, just incase anybody is curious, this is all my original photography with NO PHOTOSHOP!! Take care everyone. I wish you love, peace and joy, and all things good.

Until next time,

Namaste,

Emmerica <3